so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Floor bacon is actually really good
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Randomize