I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
