apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
