so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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