I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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