God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
