i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
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