Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
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