She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
There r osticjed everywhere
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
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