I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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