last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
