Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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