Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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