Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Randomize
