I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
