Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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