Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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