did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
