Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I need to calm my uterus...
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
