dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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