If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
you didnt know i had herpes?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
