So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Randomize
