Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Two words: blizzard sex
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
