Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
