Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
