Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
