how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
