Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
