yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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