I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
