We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize