People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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