oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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