More tranny stories later!
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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