CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
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