So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
