Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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