im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
You can't just leave with hair like that
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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