make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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