Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
