Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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