Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Duck Duck Cougar?
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
