I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize