there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
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