2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
