How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
