oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
