he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
