Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
