If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
