i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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