Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch

(740): View more from Ohio

enter at your own risk

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(954): View more from Florida

I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.

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(216): View more from Ohio

Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?

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(760): View more from California

fuck your aforementioned shoe

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(916): View more from California

Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance

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(816): View more from Missouri

You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"

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(601): View more from Mississippi

I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.

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(778): View more from British Columbia

He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.

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